Along day

Ok. wow! So I've had the last few days to mope around and completely be mad at the world. Last night I was talking to Colleen on the phone and everything that I've been feeling for the past few months(since getting out of UWP) totally exploded out of me. I was so frustrated and mad at the world. I told her that I felt like a heart shaped pin cushion who was always gushing and giving out love and that everyone else was just sticking pins into me and refusing to give the love back. Anyway, I felt a little bit better after letting that out and finally telling someone how I felt. After I got of the phone with Colleen, a friend named Michelle I.M.ed me and asked me if I was feeling any better than the last time she talked to me. Michelle had only known me for a few months, but I have a relationship with her that is stronger than most.
I really look up to her. For her to show that she actually cared about how I was feeling made the night satisfying and complete.
This morning when I woke up i felt SOOO blissful. So rejuvenated. I stayed that way all day. I love what God is doing in me even though it hurts sometime. I know my life is gonna be great.
I had three classes today. Pre- Production, Post- Production and Theatre. In my Theatre class we had to sit down and read roles out loud. I found myself getting anxious and really nervous. Me and Aoife had worked on my anxiety on the UWP trip. I was letting it get in the way. Tonight I decided that that will never again hinder me. I miss her and the help she would give me, but now I have to do this on my own. I have to go for things without being so scared that I stop myself. I've done that all my life and it hasn't gotten me very far. Just imagine how awesome my life would be if I just let go of the fear. Tonight I decided I was going to follow my heart and go into theatre and music after all. Why am I denying myself of my passion. That's crazy. Tonight has been a good thinking night...and I still have hw to do. oy!